I always speak about goals, dreams and fantasies, and the importance of distinguishing between them. My goal in studying Spanish is to communicate with Spanish people and enter Spanish society. My dream is to speak fluently, with anyone about anything. My fantasy is to write glorious Spanish poetry or be remembered as a fine Spanish storyteller.
The goal is what we are working on; it is attainable, or should be. The dream is our north star, giving us a direction in which to go, even if we never quite get there. And the fantasy should be thought of as entertainment, a kind of ego trip that is best enjoyed and then released.
This morning in my reading the Buddhist monk was discussing some very far-out things about the nature of reality and interdependence and how advanced practitioners can see clearly through all delusion and live in a state in which there is no separation and there are no concepts such as interdependence.
For him, I suppose that is the current reality, and perhaps for his advanced students that is the goal. For me, now, it is probably fantasy – although as we proceed toward our goals, fantasies can become dreams. For example, I used to fantasize about living in Europe, when it seemed there was practical way to do so. Today I live in Europe. As I built a remote lifestyle, one small step at a time, the idea of living in Europe slowly became more realistic. Likewise, I am sure there are people writing poetry and stories in Spanish who were not born into the Spanish language. Therefore the path from not-speaking-Spanish to being a Spanish poet has been trod before. It need not always be a fantasy.
But when I sit down for a Spanish class, it’s best that I am not distracted by what is currently a fantasy. I take aim at my dream of speaking fluently, accept its distance from me, and then focus closely on my goal, which is learning the language, one step at a time. If I am struggling with the various past tenses, for example, the important thing in that moment is to keep struggling, keep working, with one eye on the task, one eye on the goal, and an awareness of the dream. For that moment, it’s best to let go of the fantasy.
And in that thought I realized maybe I had added a layer to my thinking about goals, dreams, and fantasies: the task. Currently my task is to improve my proficiency at using the past tense, especially with the two different verbs that mean “to be.” That is a task which moves me towards my goal, and it’s best to focus on the task in the moment. The dream and fantasy are still there, of course, but for now they don’t need my attention. My task does, in service of my goal.
In my meditation chair, I let go of what for me is the fantasy of attaining Buddhist monkness. My dream is to live life in a state of mental and emotional peace, practicing acceptance of all living things and situations. And to move towards that, I am pursuing my goal of increasing mindfulness. And for that, I practice the daily tasks of reading and sitting. The task is to practice calming the mind, allowing it to rest with compassion so that I can see clearly into the present moment. The goal is mindfulness. The dream is true peace with myself and life. The fantasy is, for me, being a wise healer whose company and counsel is sought by others.
And that’s fine, as a fantasy. For now, I aim myself at a peaceful life filled with compassion and presence, remember the current goal of mindfulness, and then get to work on the task at hand.
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